The encourager: the role everyone underrates
What an encourager does, why the role has so much impact, and how to become a good one without applying pressure.
When someone told me I was a good encourager, I had to look up what that even meant. Today I think it's one of the loveliest roles in the scene, because it does so much and makes so little fuss about it.
What is an encourager?
An encourager doesn't feed, they accompany: motivating, cheering on, listening, celebrating what someone achieves. You're the tailwind, not the hand on the spoon.
The difference from a feeder
A feeder spoils actively and is often physically closer to the action. An encourager works through words and attention. Many feedees and gainers say that exactly this kind of support is the part that carries them, especially on bad days.
Why the role has so much impact
Growing is partly a head thing. Someone who has a person that honestly says "I see your progress" is more likely to stick with it and feels less alone. That isn't a sideshow, it's often the core.
How to be a good encourager
- Ask instead of dictating. What does the person actually want? Your job is support, not direction.
- Motivate, don't push. The fine line: encouragement feels good, pressure feels tight. When in doubt, ask.
- Respect boundaries. What's wanted today may be different tomorrow. That's okay, see also our community guidelines.
Where to begin
Put "encourager" in your profile, and the right people will find you. Create a profile and introduce yourself.
Still unsure about the terms? This way: Feeder, feedee, gainer: who's actually who?.